I feel that there's a long way ahead of me before I realize who I really am. I might have an idea but that's just a small part of it. There are some things that I could change though.
I know obvious facts about me for example, where I'm from, what I'm going to school for etc. That's just the outside and what I want people to know about me. Making myself vulnerable is no problem. Yes, I know people judge but it doesn't bother me as much because life goes on.
I'm a shy person and it kills me. I bring myself down a lot because of it. I try to always push myself outside of the box. I try talking to people whenever I have the chance but I won't start a conversation because that's just how I am and I need to change that. There's been times where I stay home alone and my roommates go out because I'm shy and scared. I tell myself that I can do it and it's a work in progress. I know I can get there.
Another thing that I could change and I've probably been doing this all my life and just coming to the realization that I do it. When something doesn't go the way I want it, I bring myself down. I torture myself with my thoughts and I know I need to stop and turn bad outcomes into positive things and learn from them.
These are just some things that I am aware of at this point. I'm barely 19 and have a lot of growing and learning to do. There's a lot of things that I have to find out about myself. That's where I am in my life right now. A long journey ahead of me and it's one I'm looking forward too.
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